Three reasons we can sometimes get stuck

The first four skills of Inner Leadership are the ability to stay calm in a crisis, to make clear sense of the situation, to find more opportunities to move forward, and then be able to choose the best way forward, even when the outcome is unclear.

Even when we know how to do this, we can still sometimes find ourselves feeling stuck.

There are three main reasons.

The first is overthinking or analysis-paralysis. This is when we over-analyse a situation so much so that we cannot take a decision. Like Hamlet, we flip back and forth between the possibilities, endlessly asking ourselves: “Option A or Option B, that is the question…? And what about Option C or Option D? And what if I fail? And what if I succeed? And what about Option E or Option A again…?”

The second reason we can get stuck is when we aren’t sure who we want to become: if we don’t know the destiny we want to create for ourselves how can we choose our best next step to get there?

And the third reason we can sometimes get stuck is simply because of fear: fear of the unknown, fear of failure, and even fear of success.

So the next key skill or competency of Inner Leadership is the ability to overcome these three blockages and move forward.

And to do that we need to learn that:

  1. In a time of massive change we will never be able to predict or control what happens, so all ways forward are a step into the unknown
  2. When everything is changing, the biggest danger comes from staying still
  3. There is no ‘correct’ answer, only the option that brings us, and the people around us, the most energy and enthusiasm to wake up every morning longing to make it happen
  4. Even when we ‘fail‘ to achieve a particular goal we still gain useful learning and experience. And that will then help us to find a new way forward from wherever we have got to

Once we know these four things we can let go of the three main reasons we can feel stuck. And then we can begin. And this is the next key step to becoming antifragile.

Have you ever found yourself feeling stuck? Were you feeling afraid, overthinking, or did you simply not know the destiny you wanted to create for yourself? Did you eventually choose the way forward that most inspired you? Would you like to be able to do this more quickly next time?


Adapted from Inner Leadership: a framework and tools for building inspiration in times of change.

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(And remember: you can’t learn to swim just by reading about swimming, you also have to do the practice.)


Photo by National Library of Scotland via StockPholio.net

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