Three reasons we can sometimes get stuck

A car attempts to pull out a car that has got stuck in the mud

The first three competencies of Inner Leadership are the ability to stay calm in a crisismake clear sense of the situation, and then find more opportunities to move forward.

But even when we have developed these skills we can still sometimes find ourselves feeling stuck.

There are three main reasons for this:

— The first is analysis-paralysis or overthinking. This is where we over-analyse a situation so much that we cannot take a decision. Like Hamlet, we flip back and forth between the possibilities and consequences, endlessly asking: “Option A or Option B, that is the question… Or Option C or D? But have I got it right? And what if it doesn’t work? And what if it does work… And… ?”

— The second reason we might find ourselves stuck is if we aren’t sure who we want to become, the destiny we want to create for ourselves. After all, if we don’t know what we want to have achieved by the time we reach our death bed, how can we choose the best next step towards achieving it?

— And the third main reason we can sometimes get stuck is fear: fear of failure, fear of success, fear of the unknown, fear of what we might encounter along the way.

So the fourth key skill or competency of Inner Leadership is to learn how to identify, understand, and remove these blockages:

  1. To accept that in a time of massive change we will never be able to predict or control what is going to happen, so all ways forward are a step into the unknown
  2. To realise that there is no ‘right’ answer, so choosing the path that will bring us the most energy and inspiration is how we give ourselves the best chance to create what we most want in the world
  3. The biggest danger in a time of change is to stay still and do nothing

This is the next key step to becoming antifragile.

Have you ever found yourself stuck? Was it because you were overthinking, afraid, or didn’t know what destiny you wanted to create for yourself? Did you choose the way forward that most inspired you? With hindsight, do you wish you had?

Adapted from Inner Leadership: a framework and tools for building inspiration in times of change.

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Photo by National Library of Scotland via

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