How transitions can become your friend

Ferns unfurling

Transitions are the name we give to the emotional and psychological processes that accompany the major changes in our lives.

Because they are associated with change they can seem difficult, painful, or hard. But they become easier when we realise that our whole life has been filled with transitions.

Our first transition happened on the very day we were born.

Our mother’s contractions formed the first, ‘Separation‘ phase. This prepared us for the changes that were coming. Then, during the birth itself, we crossed the second Threshold phase: out into a strange, unknown new world. Then we Consolidated our transition by learning the incredible new skills of breathing, eating, seeing, hearing, and making sense of the world in ways we had never done before.

We had no understanding or control over any of this process and yet we accomplished it all seamlessly. And by the end we had learned new ways of understanding our world and achieving what matters most.

The same process is happening now.

This time of churning and change is bringing us more transitions than we are used to, and faster. But by approaching them with the right attitude (and with the skills that we can learn in Chapter 7) we can learn to move through these transitions faster and more smoothly.

Then we can learn to use them as an opportunity: to develop deeper understanding of who we are, what we care most about, and new skills and capabilities for inspiring and creating what we most want in the world. Then Transitions can become our friend: an opportunity to grow.

These are the skills that Chapter 7 of Inner Leadership provides.

Have you experienced any changes or psychological transitions recently? Did you find them difficult? Would you like to have had the skills to navigate them faster and use them to your advantage?


Adapted from Inner Leadership: tools for building inspiration in times of change.

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