Research shows that when people don’t have much information or can’t predict how things are going to turn out, most people are not very good at taking decisions.
In this time of massive change, when nobody knows for certain how anything is going to turn out, this makes it easy for us to get stuck.
We’ve seen that two ways to get unstuck are learning from people we admire and learning from our past. A third approach is to learn from our future.
One of Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is to “Begin with the end in mind.” Peter Drucker said almost the same thing when he told us that the first step to a successful outcome is to “Define what finishing well means to you.”
This means that we will be able to move much more easily through this time of change if we begin with our ultimate end in mind: if we define what it will take to finish our life well.
To do this, imagine yourself on your deathbed, looking back at your whole life. Then ask yourself:
“What kind of a life do I want to look back on?”
“What will it take for me to have made good use of my time?”
“What will it take for me to have lived a worthwhile life?“
If you want to make it easier for yourself to navigate this time of change, you can do this now. Identify between six, seven, or eight broad categories or areas of life that are important to you: things that if you achieve them will mean you have lived a worthwhile life, your way.
Given the amount of change that is happening in the world, it is probably best not to pick specific outcomes. So much change is happening that some specific achievements might soon become impossible and others might become trivial compared with what you can now achieve. Instead, define broader categories or areas (such as ‘work’ or ‘relationships’). This will give you more flexibility to adapt to a changing world.
It is your life, it is your list. Choose six to eight things that will matter most to you on your deathbed. Your six to eight answers to the questions:
What will it take for you to live a worthwhile life?
What does finishing your life well look like to you?
What do you want to look back on when you’re older?
(And remember that these do not have to be your final answers. You can always update them next week if you come up with a better idea. These are just your best understanding of yourself today, to help you navigate a changing world.)
When you have found your answers there are a couple of ways that you could use them.
You might define in detail what you think a perfect outcome would look like in each category (what would ’10’ look like in each case), then create a detailed plan to achieve them all. But in a changing world that plan might not last long. And as you get older your priorities might change.
A more flexible approach would be to define what you think ’10’ looks like today, in each category, and then decide what your priority actions are — this week, this month — to move yourself towards those goals. This allows you to remain focused and flexible, as you and the world around you change.
And a third approach is simply that whenever you find yourself needing to take a decision, with little information and without knowing how things are going to turn out, you can ask yourself which course of action will lead you best towards what a worthwhile life looks like to you. Then choose that direction.
In a churning world, what matters most is no longer whether or not we achieve a particular outcome. In a churning world, what matters most is that we spend the time we have working towards the priorities that matter most to us. If we do that consistently then we will end up on our death beds having lived our lives our way. We will live in line with the purpose and values that matter most to us. We will become the person we most want to become.
As Steve Jobs put it:
“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”
They say that when you die your whole life flashes before your eyes. Better make sure it’s worth watching.
What will it take for you to have lived a worthwhile life?
Adapted from Inner Leadership: a framework and tools for building inspiration in times of change.
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